I find myself lonely. It's Christmas eve...tomorrow is Christmas...only for me it will be just another day. We had out Christmas last week and had planned on going to TN to be with my dads mom on Christmas...although its a hard trip and not much fun at all...I was looking forward to it. Or at least...it was something to do. But because of the ice we could not go. And now I sit here just like I did yesterday lonely, but only because I made myself that way.
For one I'm frustraded at my dad. I like to take walks with my mp3 player to get out of the house and have some time to myself without being locked in my room. He won't let me go by myself...which is kind of the whole point. Its so annoying that he treats me like I'm 5 and won't trust me with anything...but then gets mad at me when I'm finding a way to entertain myself - being silly and laughing with Daivd. He doesn't care to hear what I have to say or about my life...hes just concerned about his theology blog on his laptop, which is a "great ministery"-mom. Well it was great until it became more important than his family (in my opinion)...(which doesn't count for anything)
I could go on about everyone and complain all day. Truth is I just want out of here but there is no where to go....I want a friend right now. I want to wallow but I don't know why. And I'm so sick of feeling that way. I'm pretty sure this is the worst Christmas ever...but wait..."Last time I checked Christmas was about Jesus" -Meh.
Not me.
-selfishly living but praying to be better,
Faith
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1 comment:
Hey Faith :)
Briauna here.
I just wanted to say, I know exactly how you feel. The same thing has happened to me before! My dad just now got to the point to where I can walk by myself and I'm almost twenty! It was so frustrating. I would just sit and cry and just long to be out, even doing something simple as walking and be by myself, and when he wouldn't let me I'd be even more frustrated than I already was. I don't really know what else to say other than that I completely know how you feel. I know what it means to be lonely and yet at the same time wanting a few minutes to myself. It's kind of a mystery, the longing that young girls feel. But do know, that we should definitely talk more, and hang out. I'd love to get to know you better. It seems we have a lot in common. :)
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